The constant clicks of a jackhammer forced me to open my eyes for a nice, summertime slumber. Sitting up in my bed, I look out the slightly dirty window to my left to see construction underway, starting far too early for any normal human being. I reach to my mahogany bedside table and sloppily pat my hand around for my phone. The bluish white light stings my eyes as I stare into the brightness, waiting for my eyes to adjust.
I groan, throw my phone to the side, and fling myself face first back into my baby blue sheets, burying my head in my pillows. The summer before university, where you soak up rays, eat bad food, and where construction starts much too early in the morning. Despite my best efforts, the sound that drilled into my ears did not fade. Defeated, I rose from my bed and stepped onto the white carpet of my bedroom, closing my eyes and stretching my arms up to get all of that sleepy stiffness out of my system. I opened my eyes and began to walk to my bedroom door. I felt a vibration to my right, seeing my phone lit up once again. I walked towards the light and crouched down to pick it up. A text notification filled up the screen. I opened my phone and made my way to the messaging icon, tapping on it. A text from my group chat of friends.
whos free today
I smiled. What an awesome way to spend a Friday.
what time and whose house
I turned my phone off to wait and see who else was interested in meeting up on a cloudy and humid day. I walked towards the door once again. The cool metal handle made me jump, as I turned it clockwise. I headed down the stairs, preparing to see if anyone was awake when I realized I was home alone. My parents do an annual trip together in the third week of June where they head east to see my extended family. I was never a big fan of my mom's side of the family, and would only go to see them if there was no other choice. This time, there were other choices, so I happily took the offer of house-watching for five days. I was never a good party host, so there were no worries of the house being destroyed when they arrived. I made my way to the fridge in the kitchen when my phone vibrated in my hand.
I decided it would be a good time to reply.
my house, any time past 11
sweet cya then
I set my phone down on the marble-topped island in the kitchen and got some eggs out, wanting to have a full stomach and get the house set up for my friends. Although I couldn't handle a party, three guests were manageable. I set the egg carton on the island, excited to get my panties ripped out of my pants by my friends at 11 o' clock.
I was sprawled across the couch watching Sherlock when the doorbell rang. Since the arrangement to meet up, I had changed from my pajamas into blue skinny jeans and a brown belt, a black shirt, and some black taco socks. I love tacos. I jumped up from the couch and hopped towards the door, opening it to find two of the three friends, Angelica and Macy.
"Hey, guys!" They walked in as we hugged. Macy always puts her head to the left when she hugs people, and I put mine to the right, so my face made a collision with her circular wire-framed glasses. She's a weird hugger. We laughed it off as we all headed towards the staircase that led downstairs. It was a big room that held a TV, all our consoles, and a couple couches. Most importantly, it was where the sacred fabric pulling took place. Wedgies. Introduced in my early teens, I took on a sexual liking towards them. I couldn't describe why. They just... work. I'm a pretty open person, so eventually, I told my closest friend at the time; Macy. Funny enough, she shared the same feelings for them. It was almost too perfect when she told me that Angelica got her engines revving by wedgies, as well. And then there's Amelia. She moved here a couple years ago. By then, Macy, Angie and I had been well experienced with wedgies. We knew how someone like us would react to getting a wedgie. One, regular, bland, tasteless, completely average day, it happened. Amelia had been living here for a couple weeks, and she received a wedgie from another girl in our class. I mean, they're not something crazily out of the ordinary. They're on TV everywhere. Guys get 'em, girls get 'em. It's a piece of the puzzle in slapstick comedy. They aren't weird, but somehow, they got sexualized by our bodies. We saw Amelia's reaction, we looked at each other, and we knew. From there on, out little wedgie cult had been formed. We pushed the boundaries on how far underwear could stretch. We created new wedgies.
But the best part? No one had a clue except us. We had a system of getting rid of ripped underwear. We would stuff it in a used up toilet paper roll, and dispose of it in the bathroom garbage can. I've heard of people going through the kitchen's garbage, but never have I experienced someone going through the bathroom garbage. We had worked out the logistics on everything. Despite this, we were still regular people. We could go out in public and hang out with each other without talking about wedgies, but when we did talk about them? Oh boy, we could drone on for hours. The meaning of life is to find your own meaning, and we had found ours.
As soon as our butts hit the couch, the doorbell rang. Amelia had finally arrived. I ran upstairs, with Angelica and Macy trailing behind me. I looked at my phone.
I swung the door open, and there stood Amelia.
"You're four minutes late," I began. "You're getting the first wedgie."
"Gladly," she replied. I liked her spunk. We found ourselves downstairs once again. Although the basement seemed ordinary at first, it was far from it. Hooks on the wall... for jackets? Haha, nice try. The walls were painted a dark beige, with pictures of our family everywhere. It was a rectangular room with a fairly low ceiling. It was dimly lit, with one window that looked towards the side path of our house. A door to the backyard was on the opposite end of the entrance, with the blinds closed. We moved to the centre of the room, an open space, with a floor made from wooden planks that varied in colour. Amelia stepped into the centre, and we circled around her.
"What should we start off with?" I asked. The floor was open for ideas. We each had our own favourite wedgie. Angelica favoured the shoulder wedgie, as it was possible with all types of underwear, as long as your shredded the leg holes to fucking oblivion. Macy was more adventurous. She loved the hanging wedgie. Stuck, helpless, painful, pleasuring... awesome. Amelia was less intense. She preferred a chair wedgie. It could be done pretty much anywhere, was capable with most undies, and wasn't too painful. For me? Well, there's only one that could top all three of those: the atomic. The king of all wedgies. I loved it because of how rare it was. You couldn't use any old panties and get an atomic. You needed ones that were particularly stretchy, and table to withstand a little destruction. If you had brand new undies, you needed to pop all the fabric connecting the waistband to the main part of the underwear. I really, really loved that sound. It meant stuff was getting done.
The beauty of our undercover wedgie system was that we each had giving and getting preferences, and it worked out pretty awesomely. Macy and I were more on the giving end, so naturally, Amelia and Angelica were the best givers, so it was always interesting when the roles swapped places, like now. Amelia was mostly facing Angelica, so when Macy and I looked at each other and nodded, Amelia did not notice. In perfect unison, Macy and I sprang into action, as I lifted up her light green shirt and Macy pulled back her shorts. Amelia jumped at the sudden contact on her backside. Macy and I both placed one hand each on her waistband, smiled at each other, and rocketed stretchy nylon and spandex way up her back. Her hot pink underwear popped at the sudden yank, a symphony of tearing that told us to keep pulling. We held our grip strong as the leg holes slithered their way into her, and in return, the waistband reached higher, touching her upper back. Macy and I let go as the underwear rebounded back towards Amelia's shorts like an old elastic band. My heart was pumping, and I didn't want to wait any longer.
"Me next!" I said like a sugar-rushed six-year-old. I immediately lied down on the ground. My belly hit the cool wood floor, making me shiver. I made sure to keep my head down so I didn't know who would be pulling. I very intentionally picked out my clothes this morning. Although taco socks were a cool addition, what really mattered was underneath my jeans. A pair of yellow, stretched out panties, and also...
"WEDGIE!" Amelia yelled as she took ahold of my undies and ripped them up my back at a force I wasn't aware capable by her. A shade of light yellow instantly covered my back with the force of Amelia's pull, reaching my upper back. I made sure not to stretch them out too much. Just enough to give Amelia some hope, and but not enough to make it rip. I closed my eyes and prepared to enjoy this moment.
"Jesus Annika, what the hell did you do to your yellow undies?" exclaimed Angelica. These were my go-to atomic undies. With a little flexibility, I could bend back enough to get them over my head. With the force of Amelia, I was seriously doubting I would need to bend back even a little bit. Amelia was giving sharp, strong pulls to the underwear from the leg holes, really driving them in there. It felt awesome. I could tell she wasn't trying to finish the job quite yet. She really wanted to draw this our as much as she could. She maneuvered her way to the top of my shoulders, where she say down. Amelia placed her feet on my shoulders, all while maintaining tension on my poor little undies... or rather, poor giant, stretched out undies. With her position, she had full control. The only way she could pull on my underwear would be straight up my back. She would lean forward as much as possible, then slowly lean backward, as my underwear would further work its way in. Eventually, this movement became bland to her, as she released my underwear temporarily. She leaned back, did a little stretch, then gently placed both of her hands on my waistband. Used to the slow, drawn out pulls she was previously doing, I was taken completely by surprise when she yanked on the elastic with as much force as possible. My underwear easily made it to my head, but it wasn't completely over yet. Like a snail, she made my waistband sluggishly crawl its way over my scalp, until it reached my forehead. She released, but the tension did not. My waistband had been securely attached to my forehead. It was like something out of those unrealistic wedgie stories you read online. It felt awesome. I sighed.
But they were still missing something until Macy's sharp eye caught sight of another colour in my jeans.
"Hey Amelia, Annika is still wearing another pair of panties!" Amelia looked towards my jeans. Bingo. I could feel her smile grow exponentially wider, as she wasted no time in getting back into sixth gear. Another shade of colour rocketed its way up my back, this time, green.
"Hey guys, help me carry Annika to the Hooks," Amelia said to Macy and Angelica. My heart started beating faster. The two hooks of doom. The place that all hanging wedgie fantasies came true. It was almost like they could read my mind. Surely enough, I felt two pairs of hands lift me up from my chest and from my thighs, while Amelia made sure to keep hold of my other green panties. They made their way over, carrying my horizontally, until I was flipped ninety degrees, but still firmly held by the hands of Macy and Angelica. By the handiwork of Amelia, both pairs of leg holes found their way onto hooks, and I felt Macy and Angelica's grips loosen.
"3..." Amelia began. My heart beat felt like Bugs Bunny's when he sees a pretty rabbit dame, reading to burst through his chest at any moment. No matter how much I wanted to, a shade of yellow over my head prevented me from seeing anything.
"2..." My breaths were heavy.
"1..." I wanted to scream so they would get on with it. I couldn't wait.
"DROP!" And drop I did. I was stopped short of the ground by two pairs of panties. One yellow, one green, they stood strong underneath my wait. There I hung, in my beautiful, dark, twisted fantasy.